The theme for today’s post is talking about nice guy mistakes to avoid, the things that they do that truly turn women off.
You’re such a nice guy and I enjoy your company but I don’t think we’ll get along together, Have you heard something along this lines from a girl ?
Well, at one point in our lives as men we’ve been told things like this.
Personally the reason I became Alpha and turned red pill was because I kept getting into the friendzone with ladies even when I acted nice toward them and played the role of the nice, gentle, easy-going guy Idolized in Disney movies.
The truth is that being a nice guy doesn’t just work, women can really pick up and this and know that you’re only trying to manipulate your way into their pant and that you’re acting too nice for your selfish reasons.
READ ALSO: How does an alpha male pursue a woman
Now in this post I will uncover 10 nice guy mistakes to avoid, the tips discussed below can completely change your life and make you get what you want whenever you want, not just from girls or in dating alone, the tips discussed below will help you in career, business and leadership.
Ready ? Lets go!
Nice guy mistakes to avoid: 10 traps to avoid when dealing with women
1. Complimenting her too much
If you’re not new to this blog you already know my take on giving ladies compliments and how easy it is for a guy to say something thinking that it’s a compliment when it turns out you’ve just offended her or you’ve just turned her off completely.
So if said in the wrong way it can really mess up the attraction that you are trying to build.
Now the reason why nice guys get compliments wrong is because they depend on a lady’s appearance but just talking about how amazing a lady looks comes across needy and as if you just out to get one thing.
So nice guys are the type of people that endlessly tell girls how beautiful they are which comes across desperate and very shallow and we should know by now the best compliment to give a lady is something that you know she’s worked towards, something she has invested in because you’ve got to remember just because someone is beautiful and they won the lottery with their good looks when they were born doesn’t mean that they don’t hear a compliment from other guys every single day and she probably doesn’t even care for it.
So instead you’ve got to say something unique and show the lady that you are giving her a compliment based on how she dresses, her car, something that she’s actually put time into learning.
2. Buying her gifts
Gift buying is truly amazing especially for birthdays, Christmas and that random little gift every now and then but specifically if a lady has the receiving gifts as their love language.
A nice guy chooses to shower girls with gifts and favors to manipulate her into liking him much more, now deep down he thinks that he is showing how expensive he is by taking her to fancy restaurants and buying her lots of expensive gifts and doing lots of things for her as if she’s going to turn around (all of a sudden) and think oh my gosh I didn’t like him yesterday but he bought me a new Pandora charm bracelet today, took me out for lunch for dinner and he sent me 150,000 pounds – I love him!
Now this can work in some cassis, especially f you happen to be a nice guy and you are trying to attract a gold digger where she will essentially just use you for the value of gifts.
However the average high value lady when she receives lots and lots of expensive gifts is going to realize straight on that it’s a sign of manipulation and this is where nice guys get it wrong.
It loses that integral value of something romantic and a nice gift because a woman just feels forced to actually talk to the guy.
3. Begging for her to like him
I get it; nice guys feel that if you just tell her and tell her how much you really want to date. Proclaim it from the streets and tag her in lots of things on Facebook she might come around to the idea that it’s a good idea, I understand that but it doesn’t work.
It never has worked and it never will and it shows that this guy is pathetic and very desperate and she will most definitely lose interest and respect if he cannot handle the word no!
4. Investing into her life way too much
A nice guy feels that they have to completely merge themselves with a lady; they try to become part of her life quite literally.
He may call her several times throughout the day, continuously send her gifts in the post or constant messages up on Face book messenger, tags her in things, follows her physically around and always happens to appear on her lunch break and then tries to hang out when she hangs out with her friends.
Now it’s a huge mistake because it doesn’t allow any individuality to form in a relationship and obviously it’s pretty creepy.
Most nice guys don’t get past the friend zone stage, so if you happen to feel like you see this lady around a lot and there happens to be the same guy behind her as she’s getting coffee every single day it’s a fact that he’s a nice guy and most definitely stalking her.
Now most nice guys are codependent and having this trait is not attractive, especially if they feel they have to always show up so that this lady can see them for them again to just fall head over heels.
This is a typical thing that you will see on the internet, a guy wearing a fedora swinging around a katana bragging about his finances, his knowledge or something that only he has access to such as like a vim access to a public event or unlimited first download of a new play station game.
A nice guy seems to think that he can impress a lady with his knowledge and finances and so much that they just swoon over him and then immediately boom they are in a relationship.
Now the reason that guys do this is because they have a lack of substance in their personality so the guy is overcompensating what he can actually provide to the relationship because he doesn’t feel he has any self-worth or anything actually worth giving to the lady.
The reason that this is a mistake it’s quite simple; nice guys depend on logic building attraction.
Now this is not how a lady works, they may feel that they have to brag about their finances, their job position, about how much money they make, how much knowledge they have, it could be something, really small but the point here is that a woman is an emotional creature.
She doesn’t care for logic building attraction, she doesn’t really give a damn what car you drive (unless of course it’s the gold digger).
Ladies are attracted to a high value personality but most importantly how a guy makes her feel.
If she doesn’t feel comfortable or attracted well there’s no relationship and by offering a very black and white logic building approach, that doesn’t build any attraction.
That was sixth tip on the nice guy mistakes to avoid when dealing with women.
6. Too much, Too soon and too often
A nice guy is someone that does not have any high value traits to their personality which is kind of sad.
They haven’t started their self-development journey and they probably don’t think that they even have to improve their life in the slightest and that therapy is a waste of time.
Common traits of a nice guy are falling so hard in love with a lady almost instantly and so passionately.
Nice guys are those that possibly say, look! We’ve been together now three weeks and it’s very obvious that we are going to be together for the rest of our lives so we may as well just speed up the process get the kids in order, let’s go off birth control, let’s get a marriage sorted and let’s get a house as soon as possible.
Now yeah it’s a great thing to see a long-term goal and just speed things up when you know things feel great and comfortable but there’s no rush and a nice guy doesn’t understand that so they don’t want to take things slow because they don’t have standards or patience or respect for another lady and they are the type of guy to propose under a year and they will definitely say I love you within a couple of weeks or months, they could probably even argue with the pros of this and say that they are being super polite and they are just being honest about their feelings but really you go and a therapist in training they will tell you that if a guy proposes in under a year and says that they love someone in less than four weeks it’s someone that is very codependent.
7. Always apologizing
One of the creepiest things that a nice guy can do is overly apologize, he could give his opinion on something, he could touch a girl or maybe attempt to touch her (like a little hug a little squeeze) and then he apologizes profusely for doing so.
They probably say things such as I’m so sorry that I told you that I liked you, I just can’t help myself, you’re just so beautiful and I’m so sorry that I touched your lower back during the office time which is resulting in this HR complaint that we’re setting right now, I just couldn’t help myself, you’re so gorgeous.
They apologize a lot of the time because they are sensing that a girl feels uncomfortable therefore they feel if they just apologize it removes any of that awkwardness that just happened and things go back to normal so he doesn’t lose the girl’s interest.
READ ALSO: Ghosting after serious relationship
Now it could be he is sensing that she feels uncomfortable or it’s just a perceived perception that she is uncomfortable so he will definitely most definitely over compensate because he always feels like he’s done something wrong that could affect the attraction of the lady and really this shows a submissive side that’s too soft and too delicate which is the complete opposite of what a lady finds attractive and thus is the reason why this is a mistake.
8. Making her decide
This one seems to be a common thing that couples argue over which restaurant to go to or what type of food they should eat; however what a girl really wants is the guy to take that dominance in the situation.
She wants him to realize that she has declined the first two suggestions because she’s in the mood for Italian food so he should say look I know that you are fancying pizza and pasta right now so let’s go to this Italian restaurant or even say I’m going to decide tonight that you have no say because I just want everything to feel less pressured for you.
I want to decide where we go so you can just eat and chill and have a good time.
But a common trait for a nice guy is to leave every decision up to the girl so that she has to decide what happens possibly on a date, she has to decide where they go on the date and maybe which is sickening, she has to decide that they should actually start dating because he wouldn’t even put himself out there to approach her.
The reason that a lady doesn’t want to always have to decide what to do is it’s a form of being submissive, if the guy does not want to take the challenge, take that dominance and step up and say this is what we’re doing blah blah blah! Well she’s not going to be building any attraction points for him therefore this is a reason why nice guys are always friend zoned.
9. Chronically asking if she is okay
A nice guy’s biggest fear is a girl losing attraction so what is he going to do?
He’s going to overcompensate, buy her gifts to win her interest, spend all of his time with her but annoyingly ask her if she’s feeling okay.
A nice guy is very codependent and that any slight difference of the tone in her voice or her body language he is going to automatically assume it’s her attraction levels dropping.
So instead to try and counter-react this he’s going to ask how she is feeling if she’s okay? If he can get her anything? If there’s anything that he can do?
Now to begin with, this is great when a guy offers this and we feel honored but it gets creepy very quickly and a woman starts to feel very uncomfortable after a while which then turns naturally into the friend zone.
10. Not sharing their true opinion
Nice guys are so scared to lose the interest of a lady that well they will keep up appearances and lie about pretty much anything and everything just so it feels as if they are impressing her.
Some common examples is to agree with a girl to go to a restaurant to eat food that he doesn’t really like, to hang out and watch films that he doesn’t really like and to attend concerts of bands that he doesn’t really like.
The reason they do this it’s a form of manipulation, they think that deep down if they can get a girl to think oh my gosh! we have so many things in common they’re absolutely amazing, well that means that she will fall harder in love with him but instead of having that natural resistance of two people being opposite but coming together in compromise instead it’s a case of he wants her to think that he is quite literally the prince in all the Disney movies and they will have an amazing happily ever after and it doesn’t work because quite quickly the girl will realize what he is doing and then that’s it he is ghosted or the woman just doesn’t feel any attraction therefore the guy gets friend-zoned.
Nice guy mistakes to avoid: Conclusion
In this post I walked you through 10 nice guy mistakes to avoid with women.
The reason women don’t find you attractive is because you repeat this mistakes and you’re not building any attraction with them.
By being too nice to women you’re only communicating to them that you’re manipulative and that they should always look out of themselves when ever they are around you because you’re being this nice for a reason.
If there is one sentence I can use to sum up the nice guy mistakes to avoid it will be to “Be your true self” around and without women.
That was it on nice guy mistakes to avoid, practice the tips and watch your dating life change forever.
Remember, sharing is caring.