My ex still has feelings for me but doesn’t want to be with me is a question I get asked by a lot of guys. You see, a lot of people that I work with say my ex still speaks to me, reaches out to me, she or he calls, texts, maybe even wants to hang out but when I mention my desire to get back together, they just don’t want to recommit.
They don’t want to make that decision, they don’t want to take that step, make that leap and it’s a very interesting thing.
My ex still has feelings for me but doesn’t want to be with me: What to do
So, as far as I’m concerned it’s because you are indefinitely available to them. You are allowing for them to wean off of you.
Every time they hang out with you they know they still can, they don’t recommit to you but they still hang out with you and so you tell them that they can have their cake and eat it too.
In their minds they’re saying well hey! I still get to hang, I still love them, I still miss them but I don’t want them in that way.
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I don’t want to recommit to them in that way but why not still hang. The whole making this post is because I think that when our exes give us a little bit, we tend to take a lot and we assume we must automatically try to get back together.
I totally disagree with that approach; I think that if you guys are broken up you shouldn’t be hanging out that often.
Don’t over present yourself, don’t make yourself too available to them, they will find this unattractive. The only reason they’re not recommitting is because they know that they don’t have to.
They know that they get to spend time with you without making that committal step and so in my opinion if you really want them back you need to let them go.
You can’t let them know that they can spend time with you when they want and then ignore you when they want because that is them controlling that relationship and now they’ve got the pants and what do you have ? Nothing!
You have a cell phone hoping it’s going to ring, you have a Facebook hoping you’re going to receive a message from them wanting to hang out with you.
That’s not the way love works. Remember it’s not just about you getting back with your ex, it’s also about them getting back with you and are you happy with this treatment?
Are you happy having an ex that wants to hang out but doesn’t want to recommit? of course you’re not. If you were you wouldn’t be reading this post and the reason I want to say this to you is because I think that tough love can go a long way and I think that if you really want to cultivate the love you have with your ex you need to be willing to step away from them.
Respect yourself so that they respect you. If you do not value your time and you only prioritize around theirs and what it is that they’re doing and what it is that they want, they will always view you as the inferior partner.
Are you attracted to something that you feel superior to? Of course not!
It’s not sexy to be able to manipulate your partner. It’s sexy to try to understand what they’re thinking and to even adjust yourself to them.
That’s why you’re more attractive to them than they are to you right now, you’re in the position of trying to interpret their actions.
They’re not interpreting anything; they’re very content with what’s going on. So, as far as I’m concerned when it comes to a situation of my ex still has feelings for me but doesn’t want to be with me – really listen to what it is that that means and listen to what is it that’s telling you.
If you want to change the likelihood of getting back together start by going into no contact. I know that for a lot of you haven’t done it yet.
Maybe you broke up and you’ve been hanging out from the very beginning without that non-committal portion.
I know that it seems like afar-fetched idea to let them go. You might be afraid of letting them go? You may not want to disconnect.
The only question I can ask is do you think that this limbo that you’re in right now is going to get you what you want? Chances are it won’t.
Based on my professional it’s rarely the result that I see. Usually you’re going to stay inches situation for a little while and one of you will get sick of it or one of you will get bored or one of you will find someone else.
Do not hang out with your ex until they find someone else. Make sure that you are always Plan A and not plan B because right now if they’re hanging out with you and not committing to you the respect is out the window that I can assure you that you can bring it back with a lot of work, effort, some TLC and patience you can bring it back
My ex still has feelings for me but doesn’t want to be with me: Conclusion
Something that is really important when you want to get back with someone you love is setting the tempo. When we want to get back with someone we need to set the pace. We need to make sure that we have the control and when we do an action your ex is responding to this action.
I know it’s not easy because most of the time you will try to understand her behavior, you will try to listen to her words, you want to make sure that they are still loving you but these are big mistakes that you’re doing.
I want you to stop these mistakes by setting the tempo, so if you’re saying my ex is talking to me, my ex is asking me what I did last weekend or is asking me a lot of question but he or she doesn’t want to come back what should I do?
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So basically when your ex is still talking to you it’s because they don’t want to lose you but there is a big difference, a huge difference between I don’t want to lose you and I want to come back with you.
When an ex doesn’t want to lose you that doesn’t mean they still love you or they want to be in a relationship.
Most of the time that means they still want to get the control of you. I know it’s not something that you want to hear because you love your ex, you really want to blow those strong and steady relationship but I am here today because I want you to understand that sometimes there is what we call the balance of power.
If your ex wants to own you, you should never let her do it because then you will change the situation. You will reverse the breakup situation and you will be able to build a new relationship.
You will be able to re-attract your ex, so when it comes to situations of my ex still has feelings for me but doesn’t want to be with me, you should change your habits, you should change your communication, change your attitude, change the way you talk to your ex, change your life to make sure that you will be able to re-attract and create some seduction.
I want you to know that your ex will make the decision to come back definitely in your relationship when they don’t have any other options.
This is why you need to make sure that your ex needs to see you as her best and only option to be happy in her life.
Meanwhile, I wrote another post where I explain How to let go of someone you love who doesn’t love you.
I give you 5 action steps to take that will let you get over it when she clearly turns you down or breaks up with you. Go check it out.
I recommend you check out David Price’s eBook titled “LoveNotes”. In this eBook you will discover a simple way to make any woman fall deeply, madly in love with you, so obsessed with you that she’ll do almost anything you want , just by using a few innocent words anyway you choose, on paper or verbally.