If you have ever wondered how to get a shy girl comfortable around you and to start that whole case of flirting to build attraction and potentially have a relationship well this is the blog post for you.
There are a couple words of caution here, you have to be very understanding of someone that is considering themselves shy but also you cannot taint a shy girl by assuming that she has low self-esteem, that’s not fair to do so.
It could just be they are just very introverted naturally and it takes them a long time to come out their shell.
READ ALSO: How to make a shy girl comfortable
So this is a post in honor of all the shy girls out there that wish that guys would just understand just a little bit more about what makes them shy so that when they do approach them it’s not as awkward.
This is mansumo.com and keep reading.
How to get a shy girl comfortable around you: 11 Practical Steps
1. Give her time to come out of her shell
The most important thing from the whole of this post is you have to give her time to come out of her shell.
I get it you want her to respond back with some attraction because you feel like you aren’t really getting anything and it probably feels like a hopeless course every time you do text her.
It’s probably a little bit awkward that she isn’t responding to you with the usual dating tactics but these needs to be said.
Please remember that shy girls take a lot more time than the average person to come out of their shell and feel okay to go towards the flirting nature into a relationship.
You need to realize that if she hasn’t turned you down, she hasn’t ghosted you, she still replies quickly to your text, she most definitely is interested but she’s not given you as much flirty behavior as you would expect the average girl to do because she’s still not quite comfortable enough to come out of her shell fully and understand there is nothing more that you can do apart from continuing to be just lovely and who you are and just be patient and wait for her.
2. Don’t ask to see her in person straightaway
Usually for the non-shy girls you have a little bit of banter over facebook messenger or on the dating app and then you upgrade it very suddenly to chatting on the phone and then you have a physical date however with a shy girl, things are just a little bit different.
Instead you need to invest a little bit more time in the online communication side of things to help build her confidence so she knows that you are a good catch.
The big thing to remember here is that a lady no matter if they are shy or confident is they are attracted to you based on how you make them feel, so if you are willing to date a shy lady, you have to be able to accompany this and to take it into consideration.
3. Don’t use the power of touch too soon
Using touch just gentle taps here and there is a great way to build attraction and to find out if the other girl really is interested in you but when it comes to shy girls you need to slow down.
A great thing to do is to just wait for her to start touching you and then you know that it’s okay for you to do the opposite.
So wait for her to give you a hug to adjust your clothes and then you know that it’s safe.
Now, if you do it too soon you go straight in for the hug on the first date she will feel very uncomfortable and it’s just not good news.
4. Focus on building friendship
Flirting is about making a lady feel comfortable and having fun and having fun is what you do in a friendship but obviously the relationship you have that sexual attraction side of things therefore you need to make her feel comfortable which is still a sign of flirting and then you get some nice flirty banter going back and forth, some personal questions and then she feels really focused and that she actually feels more comfortable with you but obviously still building that attraction.
So to begin with focus on doing things those friends would do and it will really help.
5. Avoid the big friend groups
When you first start dating someone it’s really fun, you get so used to each other.
You really like have a good team thing going on and you think hey! I want you to get to know my friends and my family so you start going on group dates with their friends and your friends and everyone becomes friend and it’s just beautiful however n a shy girl this situation she will always find the friend groups very awkward she will eventually feel comfortable but it will take her a lot longer than you would expect so don’t expect her to feel comfortable if you ask for her to go out with you and your friends she may feel comfortable inviting you with her friends but the other way around it’s a little bit different so you need to avoid approaching a shy girl with your friends around.
If she can see your friends in the background when you approach her in a bar she’s going to find this very intimidating, this also includes inviting her to your friend’s parties too soon and talking on the phone whilst your friends are in the background.
6. Ask some open-ended questions
The sixth tip on how to get a shy girl comfortable around you is about taking turns to open up to each other, to connect and then you can get her to respond but the beauty here is don’t ask her questions that would have a yes or no answer.
Remember open-ended questions means she can feel more comfortable with you, learn about you learn your opinions, some embarrassing things that have happened and it creates that banter and that’s when the interaction actually starts to form.
7. Be very mindful of your body language
A shy person is brilliantly in tune to their surroundings and the overall state of people close by.
So make sure that your body language whenever you are with her is open and friendly because anything otherwise she’s going to revert back into that shell.
So don’t be too over the top with being in her personal space she would hate that, just be open.
8. Don’t rely on competitive dates
Let’s say you are flirting with a lady, things have been going absolutely amazing and you think let’s go on some dates.
Now, the type of dates that can ruin everything are those that have a competitive nature even something as silly as crazy golf if it’s you against her.
It’s enough for her to feel very uncomfortable. She will obviously go to on the date and make an effort but she will hate it.
So some great ideas would be a craft class, going to picnics, going to museums, doing something that isn’t too physical.
9. Don’t mention the fact that she’s shy
A Very common situation is for a guy to say to the lady – you’re pretty shy aren’t you?
It’s just uncalled for and it’s the worst thing for a shy girl to ever hear.
They are very aware of their feelings and they know deep down that their shyness and anxiety causes an issue with friendships and relationships.
However it’s already pretty obvious right and it’s completely unnecessary to bring up don’t expect her to all of a sudden turn around and say that makes a lot of sense now thank you.
10. Be willing to make the date decisions
When you are talking with a girl before you even think about offering a date.
Try to actually think about the best ideal environment for her where it can cause her to come out of her shell.
She would absolutely love if you could bring up something that is an obvious compliment.
For example; hey you love harry potter and I can tell because you have the badge on your back, how about for a first date we go to the harry potter studio together.
Now she would love this because you’ve actually crossed that boundary where you’ve thought about something that she is interested in and she values.
This will give you top attraction points when it comes to how to get a shy girl comfortable around you, it really will and you have given her a decision.
She can say yes or no but she doesn’t have the decision of deciding where to go and what to do.
She’s never going to feel that whatever she suggests is going to be good enough so if you can be one step ahead and offer a suggestion, something that you know she will like she’s more inclined to fall madly and deeply in love with you.
11. Do not overdo the compliments
Guys always do this, but pay attention especially when it comes to how to get a shy girl comfortable around you.
A shy girl doesn’t really know what to do when she would hear a compliment.
She may pretend she didn’t hear it and just continue talking or doing whatever it was she was doing prior to you dropping that compliment bomb.
Now it’s very awkward for her to accept because she’s not comfortable with the spotlight being on her.
So be mindful of this, a great way that you can reduce the compliment awkwardness is to give a compliment and then offer a challenge.
For example you can compliment her on how she dresses and then you can ask for her to give you some style tips or if you have complimented on how she always looks smart and presentable at work you can ask her -do you actually have matching Pyjamas sets at home or do you just wear jeggings and a band top because I’m thinking that you are like a fashionista when you go home and it builds humor and it’s a brilliant way of flirting.
How to get a shy girl comfortable around you: Conclusion
In this post, I have given you 11 tips you can start practicing on how to get a shy girl comfortable around you.
When dealing with shy girls, the rules are slightly tilted. You don’t want to call her out that she’s shy or become too quickly touchy, nonetheless you still have to make your intentions towards her known and build a sexual vibe around her otherwise you may end up putting yourself in the friendzone.
Practice this 11 tips on how to get a shy girl comfortable around you and you’ll notice her opening herself to you pretty quickly.
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